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Kimye Wedding Plot Twists!

By 17:03 , , , , , , , , , ,

I really didn't want to acknowledge the Kim and Kanye wedding today but for all the high fashion and pre-wedding designer brunch pretentiousness, imagine how much more interesting it will be if the following 'what ifs' happened:

1) Surprise! There is no wedding!

As people arrive at the wedding, Kim and Kanye text everyone like "SIKE! We're not really getting married today LOL! But we will be at Disneyland if anyone wants to join us!"

(Imagine how pissed off everyone would be lol)

2) Kanye interrupts the priest, Taylor Swift-style

The priest begins the vows, but a deja vu moment happens when Kanye stops the priest like 'Hey priest, imma let you finish but I got one of the best vows of ALL TIME!" ...."uh huh honey!"

Well this one could actually happen...maybe.

3) Kim jilts Kanye at the altar and runs off with Ray J

Who remembers the Mariah Carey video for We Belong Together?

It is HIGHLY unlikely that this will ever happen, but you have to admit, that would be the biggest surprise ever! Even Ray J wouldn't see that coming 

4) The wedding actually takes place in Vegas

It's like 'Don't Tell The Bride' Kimye version- the couple blew all the money on all the pre-wedding celebrations and are forced to get quickly married in Vegas instead.  

5) Khloe Puts Them Paws on Kanye 

At the reception someone shows Khloe this meme and she decides to call Kanye's bluff


Kim can't believe that Khloe is literally being so rude and bursts into tears, whilst Jay Z and Beyonce pass out the the popcorn.

(I might actually feel sad for Kim if that happened, nobody wants their wedding ruined like that. But then the whole thing will probably be filmed for TV making the Kardashians even richer, so I think I would get over it) 

6) Baby North and Baby Blue get into it too!

Baby Blue is just as unimpressed by the whole wedding as her parents are. Every picture is just gonna be Blue throwing shade at Kimye's daughter like "Yo South! So you trying to steal my shine or what? Come at me I see you! I SEE YOU!"

7) Bruce goes missing but nobody notices

Reports that Bruce is "having a terrible time" and "has no plans to stick around any longer than needed" turn out to be true and he sneaks off back to Malibu with a Parisian maid and an armful of baguettes. He leaves a cardboard cut-out of himself in the corner of the room and naturally Kris and the rest don't realise the difference until 2 months later. 

8) Nothing goes wrong and they all live happily ever after! 

The wedding goes off without a hitch, and the happy married couple live a lovely, quiet, 'normal' life away from all the media. 


I'm just messing around, I'm sure everything will be fine and they'll be showing re-runs of the wedding on E! for the next six months. Back to other news...



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